there is this vending machine that has candy and tidbits and whatnots in it and there there was an old man and two primary school girls.
Well my guess was that the old man was the father and the two girls his daughter seeing how he was carrying two bags on his shoulder.
something he was doing made me really uncomfortable.
he was looking at the vending machine and thinking whether to get that chocolate biscuit for his daughter who was pleading by his side.
Not to be mean but he didnt look well off, he's more like those unemployed middle aged uncles, in his overworn ensemble of tshirt and shorts and bald. he was wearing this face of remorse like he was being forced to do something he didnt want to.
obviously the food in the machine was expansive but having that great love for his daughter he bought it for her while the younger sibling kept quiet and waited for the snack.
haha i didnt stand there and stared at them or what to figure all this out la.. i got it all in the few seconds i look at them while i was walking by that area to the lift.
anyway i felt a sudden overwhelming sense of guilt and remorse, seeing how the father was willing, though reluctantly, gave up the money to give to his children. children are sometimes really devilish little critters. they dont understand the things that are happening around them, they lack that maturity in them. i was thinking about inflation and all that stuff and seeing how the father might be unemployed and all i wanted to go put in some coins to help the dad.
While waiting, i stood in front of the lift and pondered a while and decided to take a peak back at them and i saw that they are hitting the machine because the snack got stuck while it's being dispensed. what irony! how much more can life torture people. i kept thinking and thinking that suddenly i got so many feelings mixed up inside of me. on top of the guilt and remorse before now was sadness, self pity and of course loneliness. So much so that i just placed my bag down and fell to the bed and sleep.
maybe it's the lack of sleep these past few months that drained me. i thought i had all these feelings kept up nicely. haha! on the other hand i did feel a bit happy that i left the subway cookies sold today in school for my sisters.
today was like the worst day of school ever. it's not because of too much classes but because there was practically no tutorials at all. morning was econs lecture following that was geog which mr ng was not there and then math which mr leong wasnt there too so i practically had break from 9 to 130. i should have went home la and skip every remedial lessons. sighs.. most of which are a little waste of time. tired tired tired!
well the past few weeks were nice, didnt really do much work that i slack back on studying. didnt finish the math tutorial i was suppose to do neither did i do any revision. sighs. what's up with me. i kept playing yixuan's guitar. now i can do chords instantantly. A G E D C Am Em haha! still cant do F and B maybe my fingers are too fat and soft that the flesh on my pinky and 2nd finger couldnt press the strings hard enough. targeted songs to learn! haha [dui mian de nu hai] [collide][more than words] [your call by secondhand serenade] and [qing tian] only did the intro for some the rest i could go to the chorus
haha! how's that for a beginner(: wrong things to do during exam period!!
went out with godsis and her boyfriend. gosh she's being a bit weird la doing weird stuff sighs.. anyway had cakes!(: nice nice sweet (some with alcohol) cakes haha!
took pictures too!
took this while studying at cafe cartel(: half price cake tiramisu!(:
took this at gloria jeans tiramisu too(:
well life's a bit unbalanced now. hope i can balance out work and play.. too much play now!!(: